Honestly, the entirety of my “career” as an artist has given me this false sense of belonging. People think I’m “cooler” because I can do this or that, but there’s so much weakness in my skillset. It gives me massive imposter syndrome.
Something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately, has been making this FUN for me. Like, it must be fun for me or what is this all for? If it does nothing but stress me out, make me worry, etc. how can I ever enjoy this? So I decided I want to try something new. Where I get back to blogging, enjoying the beautiful poses of my favorite creators, getting in the spirit of a release, and making it not just about sharing my creative side with others, but being able to think and help myself grow in creativity at the same time. I know this might not make a lot of sense to y’all right now, but, it does to me.
Anyways, I’m going to be working on some more challenging pieces for myself. Learning new skills, I want to stream more. Do more. Really build good energy for my creativity and knowledge to bloom. I keep getting sucked into this wind of “I have to learn clothing or I’m not really a 3D artist” which is a really shitty mindset to have. So while I’m trying to learn clothing, I’m also keeping it at arms length. I feel like when I begin to learn clothing, it makes me….so hard on myself. And I want to be kinder to myself. Maybe as I learn more and more, I will be able to be kinder to myself and that will make me able to make clothes.
Anywho, I am trying to learn more about being creative, I want to expand on numerous areas and I am hoping that this theme to a picture will help me create something. I am forever chasing a workflow that works for ME! Especially since I’m adding something huge, and new into my life: FiveM. Well, it’s not new exactly, but now I’m on a different side. With my 3D models, I have been learning a LOT about how to get them into GTA. It’s been a TON TON TON of learning, and very hard. But, it has been really cool. So, that’s coming up.
Alas, until then…. I pick out a pose from my favorite brand: Extra! I decided since I made some really cute Valentines & Anti Valentines mugs, maybe this pose!
I think that this would be good. Maybe I can find a cute cafe to hide in, pose 1 looks like it would be up my alley! Guess I’ll see you guys when I do it!
♥ – Izzy
